Relationship Milestones

I found this article on yahoo and found it quite interesting. Of course I felt I had to share it with my fellow bloggers.

First Time You Introduce Each Other as “Boyfriend” and “Girlfriend”
“Being labeled as his girlfriend -- or calling him your boyfriend -- is one way to learn that you are a solid item with your partner.” “Once you both say those words out loud it makes it real. Having the pride to give what you two have going on a name is another level of intimacy. It’s an excellent way to go deeper into the next phase of your love bond.”

Usually happens about 2 months into a relationship and is also around the time when you’ll subject him to your besties (and implore them to go easy on the questions!).           

First Time You Let One Fly
This usually happens around the 1 month mark.

You're taken by surprise but you don't really care!  This milestone reveals your true level of intimacy. It means that things have moved from the fantasy of courtship to a real relationship, warts and all.

First Time You Stop Being So Darn Agreeable
When you start getting real in a relationship it’s kind of a relief. Just don’t be surprised if he admits that those Food Network recipes don’t come out exactly right when you make them. Often we tolerate aspects of our relationship or partner because the foundation seems too risky to crack, but once things feel more stable it’s time to get real. Being more honest is a step in the right direction of an authentic relationship.

First Time You Attend a Wedding Together

At around the 6 month mark, many couples have said the “L” word to one another. But an equally important milestone is getting up the guts to ask him to accompany you to a friend’s wedding (or going as his date). This is like a coming out party for your relationship -- it announces that you’re serious and brings up heavy topics like marriage and forever-ness. Plus, watching people you care about take vows can turn into an emotional moment for the two of you. 

The sheer emotionality of attending a wedding can provoke a deep emotional response. Ceremonies can evoke spiritual connections. Often couples in the dating mode find that it triggers a reaction of ‘where does that leave us?’ Be aware of the feelings that surface and use them for learning more about your own relationship.     

First Time You Meet the Family

9 months in, expect him to take you for an awkward brunch with his parents. Or, maybe it’s to his weird Uncle Joe’s annual chili-off. Whatever the event is, the bottom line is that he’s introducing you to his people and showing you where he comes from. (And you’ll do the same.) Another part of this milestone is realizing that perhaps not all of his folks are great people, but knowing that’s ok and that he’s his own person (and so are you).

First Comfortable SilenceYou’re in the car, driving along, there’s no radio, no conversation, just utter silence. Instead of thinking up a topic for discussion you realize that it’s okay to just “be”. “You’re not concerned with filling up the silences with words to try and prove to yourself that you are connected. You can actually relax and just be with each other…which then allows you to access a whole other layer of intimacy.

The comfortable silence can happen around the 1 year mark, and it’s probably the biggest way a couple knows they are just naturally, effortlessly…together.

First Time You Face Tragedy Together

When you’ve been together for over a year, you’re bound to face some type of tragedy, such as a death or difficult situation. Any time before this, you might have just sent a bouquet. But now, you’ve been together long enough to really lean on each other.

“Facing a tragedy as a couple allows you to experience a greater appreciation of what you have together. It allows you to observe how you’ll each be there for one another in a profound and compassionate way during hard times.

First Time You Realize You’re in it for the Long Haul

It’s the smaller moments -- like the day he moves his underwear over to your place or the adoption of a stray cat that you’ll care for together -- that says this relationship is for the long-term. This usually happens after 1.5 years of dating.  

When you share a moment like this, you’re now receiving -- and accepting -- the trueness and longevity of your connection.         

First Blowout Fight

All couples have fights, even nasty ones that include hurtful words, threats and objects thrown on the front lawn. “It’s unrealistic to think you’ll never have a blowout fight if you’re going to be with someone for a long time. It shows you’re in touch with reality, and that you are willing to communicate and listen to each other, and do the work to get through it.

But the type of fight that happens at around 3 years in is usually the kind that calls your entire relationship into question -- and makes the two of you think long and hard as to whether you should put in the effort or call it quits.

“Working through a big blowout fight can show that you both are choosing to stay together and are willing to address any issues that arise.

First Time You Realize He’s Your Family

Whether or not you have kids, you suddenly feel like he is “home.” The time before the five years you’ve now been together doesn’t seem to exist and all your best memories include him.

“This is the moment you become aware that your guy is someone that you ‘chose,’” says Allison. “It’s a big step forward when you realize that it’s not about the family you were born into or raised with, but about the family you two are creating and have chosen.”